by My Choice Home Care | Sep 30, 2016 | Senior Home Care
A slip of the tongue or sharply delivered comment can deliver unnecessary pain for aging loved ones. It is easy to be irritated when Mom asks daily how to use the remote control or falls asleep in the middle of their grandson’s violin recital. It can hurt when Dad can’t remember their granddaughter’s name or can’t remember birthdays anymore. However, it is important not to blame the aging loved one for their diminished capacity. Often they are aware of how they aren’t like they used to be. It can be defeating and a bitter pill to swallow for the aging loved one and for their adult children.
The delivery of the message can make a world of difference. Seniors often lose short term memory before long term and forget all kinds of things that might seem hard to forget, like appointments or where they put their glasses. Place notes around their home to remind them and be mindful of tone.
Changing a light bulb or tying their shoes – seemingly simple tasks- can become extraordinarily difficult for elderly with arthritis. Instead of shaming, come up with solutions like having a nephew change light bulbs or take out the trash. Buy slip on shoes or Velcro shoes rather than lace ups.
Gadgets can be hard to adjust to with all capacities in place, imagine trying to learn how to use the remote with 5,000 buttons with shaky hands and poor eyesight. Instead of saying, “I just showed you this yesterday”, explain again with a kind voice. Or write clear instructions to leave near the device. Best of all: Buy senior-friendly gadgets.
Sometimes aging adults can be in the middle of a conversation talking and then shift topics without warning. If it was an important subject, stir the conversation back to the topic or bring up another time. Do your best to not point fingers.
When the story of how Aunt Midge’s dog ate the brownies off the counter gets boring after the 6th time hearing it, ask yourself, do you never repeat yourself? It’s important not to lose patience and try your best not to hurt their feelings.
All in all, getting frustrated is human, but so are the problems associated with aging like memory loss or diminished strength. Practice grace and be gentle. Caregiving isn’t just caring for the health of your aging loved one, it’s caring for their heart too.
by My Choice Home Care | Sep 16, 2016 | Senior Home Care
Though each person with dementia may be affected differently, there are many ways that it affects people similarly. Some of these affects include:
•Memory loss –particularly day-to-day memory, such as forgetting what happened earlier in the day, not being able to remember why they are at the grocery. Some people with dementia remember things that happened long ago much better.
•Communication problems – Some may struggle to follow a conversation or forget the names of certain objects.
•Confusion about time or place – not recognizing or getting lost in familiar places or being unaware of the time or date.
•Sight and elderly eye problems – increased difficulty with reading and judging distances or mistaking shiny, patterned objects or reflections.
•Unusual emotional behavior or responses – becoming sad, angry, frightened or upset. Someone may seem to lack self-confidence or display changes in mood.
•Restlessness or disorientation – in unfamiliar or noisy environments people with dementia may become confused or ill at ease.
You, as the caregiver, play an important role in helping your aging loved one with dementia in their everyday life. When you are assisting an aging loved one with dementia, remember the following points.
• Allow the person to take their time
• Be empathetic and compassionate
• Put the person at ease by being friendly and smiling
• Consider their feelings and respond to the emotions they are expressing
• Make eye contact
• Make sure that your body language and facial expressions match what you are saying
• Never stand too close or stand over someone to communicate.
• The person should be able to see your face clearly
Always try to remember to not classify your aging loved one as their set of symptoms. Try to show them that they are an individual and practice patience and kindness. You may have to establish routines that make it easier for your aging loved one. A companion caregiver can help provide the security that your loved one needs in the face of the uncertainty of dementia.
by My Choice Home Care | Sep 9, 2016 | Senior Home Care
Be there for others but never leave yourself behind.
-Dodinsky
One of the most important things that you can do as a caregiver is care for yourself. If your compassion does not include yourself, it is truly incomplete. It is not selfish to love and take care of yourself. Making your needs a priority is a necessity. It is especially necessary when you are caring for your aging loved one. It’s important to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself that you cannot pour from an empty cup.
There are many ways to take care of your needs so that you can give your best to the aging loved one. One way is to utilize the services of a companion caregiver like to ones offered by My Choice Home Care. If in your role as a caregiver of aging parents, you are also juggling a career and teenage children, you face an increased risk for depression, chronic illness and a possible decline in quality of life. Companion caregivers can provide you with peace of mind home care that gives you an opportunity to take care of your needs as well as the needs of your aging loved ones and your other responsibilities.
In addition to accepting the peace of mind that home care from a companion caregiver from My Choice Home Care can provide, there are many other ways to take care of you.
First is to realize that you cannot stop the impact of chronic or progressive illness for someone whom you care but there is a great deal that you can do to take responsibility for your personal well-being and getting your own needs met. Sometimes caregivers have misconceptions that increase stress and prevent self-care. Some of those misguided mantras might include : “ I am responsible for my parent’s health” or “ Our family always takes care of their own”, or even “ There’s no way that I can find time to relax when so much needs to be done”. One way to promote self-care is to take inventory of your personal thoughts. Ask yourself what might be getting in your way and keeping you from taking care of yourself.
Once you take an honest inventory of those thoughts and attitudes that are personal barriers to good self-care, one step at a time you can begin to look after yourself.
Here are some tools that are effective for self-care:
• Learn and use stress-reduction techniques, e.g. meditation, prayer, yoga, Tai Chi.
• Attend to your own healthcare needs.
• Get proper rest and nutrition. Exercise regularly, if only for 10 minutes at a time.
• Take time off without feeling guilty, employing the services of a companion caregiver helps with this
• Participate in pleasant activities, such as reading a good book, taking a warm bath.
• Seek and accept the support of others. Seek supportive counseling when you need it, or talk to a trusted counselor, friend, or pastor.
• Identify and acknowledge your feelings, you have a right to ALL of them. Change the negative ways you view situations.
It’s up to you to take care of yourself, with the help of a companion caregiver from My Choice Home Care; you can do that with a little more peace of mind.
by My Choice Home Care | Aug 18, 2016 | Senior Home Care
No matter the situations surrounding the health of your loved one, the fact is that you love them and want to provide the best life possible for them. Use your intuition to express your love for them. It will never fail, because you know them best and you know what has made them happy in the past. Your presence can make a world of difference for your aging loved one. If you communicate instinctually, your relationship with your aging loved on can grow even though they might not have the functions they once did. Whether it’s taking them to their favorite coffee shop or sitting and listening to them tell the stories of their life, you know what will make them feel your love.
Sight and hearing loss is common among the aging population, so it is important to consider speech when addressing somebody who is going deaf or blind. If you have a strong relationship with somebody, close proximity to earshot or their line of vision allows them to make a connection with your presence, so that they can pick up on cues such as your body language, your scent, your voice and your movements. This allows them to feel a sense of empowerment in establishing their surrounding environment. You may have to speak more loudly, but being mindful of tone is important. When speaking to somebody who is hard of hearing, it’s important to not to shout at the person, but speak at a slightly louder volume that still uses the same inflection as if speaking at a normal level. Your aging loved one may feel self-conscious, demeaned or as though they are being an irritation for not being able to hear properly if they feel shouted at.
One sense that never diminishes is the sense of touch. Comfort and love can be expressed through something as simple as massaging lotion on your aging loved one’s hands. Sometimes just a hug or holding your aging loved one’s hand can make them feel safe and secure. Touching the soft skin of a brand new grandbaby or perhaps the plush fur of their favorite pet can provide an atmosphere of love and contentment that no amount of words can express.
Remember while you are caring for your loved one, you are going through something that might be painful for you as well. Seeing your loved one with limitations may make you sad. It’s important to care for yourself as you care for your aging loved one. Take time for yourself but also take time to show your aging loved one how special they are to you. A hug from mom is just as special as an adult as it was when you were a little girl. There is no love like the love that family and friends share for one another. In the midst of stress and uncertainty, make sure that love stays at the heart of each moment.
by My Choice Home Care | Aug 5, 2016 | Senior Home Care
“If a family has an older person in it, it possesses a jewel”
-Chinese proverb
One of the loveliest gifts of life is the relationship that can be shared between a grandparent and grandchild. There are so many ways to involve grandchildren in the care of their aging grandparent. Peace of mind home care often means involving the grandkids. There are many ways that they can add enrichment to your aging loved one’s life.
Family History:
Kids may find learning history is more interesting to learn from someone who actually lived it. Children can find out what it was like to grow up during the Great Depression or World War II from grandparents who experienced life during that time. Personal stories are much easier to remember than lists of data from books. Just as much as children like to learn from stories, grandparents may find it fulfilling to talk to their grandchildren about what life was like at different periods of their lifetime. There are many that wish they had realized that family history is a fragile gift. It vanishes with time, as recollections fade, and as loved ones pass on. Many wish they had known that the most important facet of family history is maintaining a record for future generations to have. A fun activity from grandkids may be to interview their aging loved ones and record in writing or in audio tape their stories. This could be an incredible way for the aging loved one to leave a legacy and a special way for the younger generation to bond.
Life skills and Wisdom:
When your aging loved one was growing up, many learned skills such as sewing, gardening, baking, farming or woodworking that are great things to pass on to grandchildren, as they may not be commonly taught anymore, but are still very useful skills to possess. Teaching their younger counterparts these skills enriches the grandparent as much as the grandchild. Grandparents can not only teach life skills but also can provide their wisdom for life lessons and other advice because they’ve often lived through the same or similar experience. Knowing how a grandparent dealt with problems in their lives and knowing that they got through everything can be a valuable tool. Grandparents have lived long enough to realize not to get upset over the little things. Young grandchildren can learn to adjust their priorities after discussing problems with their grandparents, who have a broader world view.
For grandparents and grandchildren that are not close by, sending postcards and letters can be a great way to remain close and develop the art of communication in written form. Both will have a great time waiting for the next letter to come in the mail and it can serve as a great encouragement to an aging loved one to receive a letter from a grandchild. So whether the grandchildren and your aging loved one live in the same town, the same house, or in different communities, there are so many ways for them to enrich one another’s lives.
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